Wednesday, December 20, 2017

SPOILERS: Batman #37


Surprise! This is my favorite individual comic issue I've read all year. It's late, but holy shit.

The Spoilers:

The couples arrive to a fair in Smallville, but are denied admittance for not showing up in super hero themed attire. Lois suggests they switch costumes, and Bruce buries the idea and every idea that comes after. Selina tries to do the polite thing and try to find a way out for her and Bruce, but Bruce buries her pleasantries in the fucking ground too. Despite it all, here's Superman dressed like Batman, Lois like Catwoman, Batman like Superman, and then Selina just wears Lois' dress and flirts her way in.

And here's the part where I tell you "you know what, just read it, because I can't do it any justice." The night is spent with the couples going throughout the park, and doing couple things you'd expect. Clark and Lois come out of the tunnel of love holding hands, Bruce and Selina come out going at it. Half the night Bruce is telling Clark he could hit a pitch from him, then telling Selina that if Clark through it too fast, the ball would disintegrate and it wouldn't count as a strike, so there'd have to be a limit to the velocity, and Selina doooooesn't care. While the boys are doing their thing, Selina and Lois are drinking from a flask talking about how Clark is just so Kansas and Bruce is just so Batman. At a certain point, a man tries to steal Lois' clutch, and Selina just starts laughing, knowing what's going to happen to the man. 

All in all, the night ends successfully, with Lois practically forcing Selina to have a wedding event just so she can come. The two couples are about to go there separate ways when the pitch and hit gets brought up again, both men saying it's a shame they never got to do it...

Then Bruce says he knows a place, and cut to Bruce hitting one off Clark, because Batman always goes over.


The Opinion:

Zero hyperbole: This was my favorite issue of anything this year. Mind you, this was an issue of Batman, you know, the book where horrible things happen all the time, while Batman grimaces about it. There was no violence, no drama, no anything bad, it was just an issue of Batman, where two couples do couple things at a fair, and it was so god damn fun. I was laughing out loud multiple times throughout the issue, be it Bruce stoneface trying to shut everything down before they enter, or the difference between the two couples coming out of the tunnel of love. It was just so, so fun... and it's still an issue of fucking Batman of all books. 

Man, this was great.

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